Cooking for the family!!

Whenever i am home i make it a point to cook for my family. and this as i have experienced is one of the greatest ordeals that i have faced, ever since i learnt how to cook. With butterflies in my stomach, i plan a menu pleasing, fat free, non spicy, low gluten menus which are good to eat. The most challenging part about cooking for the family is that you are so attached to everybody you want to please everybody. However, a task that is hardly achievable, yet not impossible.
I had been to my aunt's house recently, where i had the pleasure of cooking for my cousins who have practically toured half the globe.And hence have seen several palates in the bygone days. Very dear to me i was eager to please and mesmerize them with something new and innovative. I decided i have to make Caldeen for them. A dish that a Goan {culinary}confidante of mine, had whispered into my ears over a Pitcher of beer. I was thrilled, as once before i had made the same and won my chefs confidence about my culinary abilities. However the thrill had turned into a more serious emotion now as i was making the same for my cousins. As i looked through the groceries kept on the racks in the shop i was wondering if my ability to choose good vegetables would be judged. the vegetables looked beautiful, and i dropped them into my bag. Then i carefully selected the spices wishing it would tingle their senses. they smelt good and i chose them too. I towed away towards the house with a bag full of ingredients which i was wishing would make a good meal.
The moment i set the ingredients on the table the lights went out plunging the house into darkness, and i let out a long sigh of frustration. I surely did not want to begin like that. But the lights came back again and i let out another sigh, of relief. My eager and supportive kin offered to help, which i gracefully made use of.Cutting vegetables, chopping onions, peeling potatoes, grinding stuff. It was a great feeling cooking with kins, something i always longed to do. As we all got into the momentum, i got busy thinking how to begin, where to begin and if my actions, would trigger, efforts to judge how good a cook i am.I looked at my cousins, something told me things would go just fine..
As i got into action sauteing onions and spices seasoning stuff and stirring the liquids on the stove, my brother came in with a small drink of coconut arrack. I took it and gulped the whole thing down, in a single shot. Shocking my aunt, who i am sure must have felt i was a pro at binge drinking!! however i assured her that i was just tasting arrack for the first time in my life, and i would be done with that. I thought it certainly wasn't the perfect time to coolly sip on arrack and cook at the same time. It would certainly take my concentration off the caldeen i was trying to make. And today, i did not want anything to go wrong with it. I tried smelling it but my nose was blocked, another thrust of tension overcame me, and i hoped the spices have blended properly, and the seasoning was alright. however i was rest assured when my sister came in promulgating that the aromas had reached her nostrils in the hall. The dish was almost done and i added the tamarind pulp and vinegar and blended it with cream for a finishing. and tasted it for the 15Th time in the past 2 hours. I decided, it was ready.
Should i have boiled the tamarind pulp before adding the coconuts or should i have added the vinegar a notch less, should i have put more jaggery... is the salt alright.. i was engrossed in retrospect, as my folks helped themselves.. i awaited the first look of disgust, or an expression of dislike.. or a smile and sign of acceptance that it was made well.
UMMMMMM, COOL, NICE, not bad.. It was like listening to frank Sinatra's new york new york on a Sunday morning.. i felt good. Thrilled that i made something that someone cherished and liked and ATE. I helped myself to a few helpings. Not bad, i thought. My folks liked it. as the last drop of scepticism got thrown out of my idle brain, i finally decided, that whenever i come home i shall cook for my folks. for my loved ones. After all it is more challenging than cooking at a restaurant or a kitchen in a hotel,because you are cooking for your loved ones and you just dont want it to go wrong..